if heaven wasnt so far away... the song is playing right now and causes me to day dream about the past month of events.
On 12-12-11 My husband and I lost an amazing lady in our life. A christian woman with a heart of gold. Aarons grandma anna. I am so blessed to have such great in-laws but Anna was amazing to me. The first time aaron took me to meet her she hugged me before I left and said I am so glad you came to him... Its like she knew that 4 years down the road she would watch as I married her grandson and the love of my life.
Anna went into the hospital this summer and thats when we got the news that would devastate the family but bring us closer together as a family. Anna sat in the hospital room surrounded by family as my mother in law told her that she had weeks to months left. The Pulmonary Fibrosis had hit hard... That was the moment that I saw one of the most amazing and strong woman in my life break down saying the words "im not ready to die" We all cried on each other but we knew we're here to support each other. The rest of the year included lots of family dinners, laughs, stories and tears. Not just tears of sadness but tears of joy because of the time we got to spend with her that nothing else can replace.
On Sunday December 11th all 9 of her brothers and sisters along with other family came over for a dinner. A dinner that she has been looking forward to. She loved being surrounded by family especially her brothers and sisters that had been there through all the years.
December 12 she died in her sleep...
The night of the funeral we were all at her house looking through pictures. I found a paper in the bottom of the box that said "I love you all dearly now dont shed a tear im spending my Christmas with Jesus this year. Merry Christmas from Heaven. Christmas
was not the same. I kept looking for her or waiting for her to walk in the door.... but i know shes in a better place where she can breath without pain and smell a flower without sneezing.
I also found a picture album of her wedding day. Her sister Hellen said I remember that say like it was yesterday. Her dress was a light blue color. Of course these pictures were in black and white and i couldnt help but wonder what that day was like in color. I thought about that day a little over a year ago when I married Aaron. The happiest day of my life....
It was amazing to see how our family came together to get through a tough time. Last saturday some of us got together at her house to start going through things. It was bitter sweet to hold some of her life in my hands. If only that necklace that I got or aarons grandpas flag that sits on our living room could tell a story, the emotions of the day it touched her hands or the meaning that it had to her. The most amazing part of the day was the birds. There was a shelf that hung in the house with these glass birds. Kristen, aarons cousin, has always loved those birds but Julie had bought them for her and part of annas wishes was everyone got back everything they bought for her so Kristen knew that. Well Julie told kristen she could have them. The look on her face was something that "thank you" couldnt even compare to
I know that i will always carry her memory in my heart and that something that can never be taken away. Our future children will know how amazing of a lady she was and i know that a piece of her will be in our children.
If I listen closely i can hear the rustling of angel wings and i know your still with us. Love you anna
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